My level of fitness has increased massively and with this, there are the usual benefits; sleeping better, feeling happier, a massive change in my attitude and my overall outlook on life is much brighter. Find out how you can benefit from the Home Run Project, it could be the start to a whole new way of life …
I’ve just got back from a great walk up Mount Snowdon, alongside 12 friends and the fantastic staff of Activate. At first, when I was asked to do the walk, the usual questions came to the fore – What will I need to wear, can I do it in jeans, etc. The trip was specifically to see the sun setting over Snowdonia…
The Basement Recovery Project is and has been an invaluable source of friendship and support not just for my partner as he found his feet in recovery but for the whole family throughout and beyond.
My dad was an alcoholic. He would swing from a happy every-day comedian to a violent bully. He always seemed happy when surrounded by his mates and in the pub, but things were often different when at home. We’d often feel the wrath of his frustration through not being able to work due to arthritis. I remember all the times I was verbally and physically abused. I’d even received a broken nose for eating a lettuce sandwich – that kind of sums up the environment I was brought up in. Mum tried her best, but her best was always hindered by dad.
As soon as I left school, I left home too. Living there, the environment changed on a day to day basis depending on how much he’d had to drink (or how much he hadn’t). My mum was, most of the time, very depressed and unhappy. As soon as I left the house she got divorced from my dad. I was the last one to leave (the youngest of five kids) and this was what she was waiting for, all the kids to leave home so she could leave too.
New Alcohol Unit Guidelines from UK Government
The government’s alcohol guidelines are changing to reflect new evidence about the link between alcohol and health harms, particularly cancer. New guidance includes changes to the amount men and women can regularly drink, one-off drinking sessions and advice for drinking in pregnancy.
Click here for our guidelines information page.
Problem: Alcohol – over 25 years
Abstinent: 13 months (and counting)
I can see now, after working through all aspects of my recovery, with TBRP and AA that I was born an alcoholic. By that I mean I had a reaction to alcohol that produced the addiction, this ‘ism’ that I now understand and recognise completely as being prevalent in me from an early age; the mental compulsion and, most definitely, the spiritual malady.
My name is Tim and first and foremost I’m a recovering alcoholic. I went into my last detox on the 2nd May 2012 and came out on the 16th May 2012 and for me, this was my last chance because after six previous attempts nothing had changed. I “white knuckled” it for six months before a great friend of mine Clare, now sadly passed away, suggested that I might have untreated alcoholism and to go to The Basement Project for help and advice which I did. After going through the programme; pre-recovery then abstinence, things started to make sense and slowly I could feel my life getting back on track. The TBRP staff asked me to go round the programmes again, this time as a volunteer to aid people who may require help, which I gladly did.
I myself have issues around intimacy, largely due to the home I was raised in and the way I was treated growing up. I have had serious trust issues with friends, associates and close relationships. I have even had trust issues with my Higher Power. I have often substituted sex for intimacy and love because of fear and shame. I did not know how to have a healthy, intimate relationship.
I never really thought that I was enabling my partner. I did not count bottles or pour them down the sink. I never had to bail him out or try to hide his drinking. But as I looked at my behaviour I realised that I had in fact been enabling him to drink.
So often I have found myself reacting to his bad behaviour by being angry for days and not talking to him. I would then threaten him and yell at him. I guess he could then justify being angry at me and his way of coping with this was to numb himself in booze. I would try to set boundaries, threatening to leave him and not follow them through. I was so angry, scared and confused. I couldn’t make him quit drinking. I couldn’t fix him or make him do what I wanted.
Meeting up with other carers whose loved ones, friends or colleagues are suffering from the effects of alcoholism is a very courageous step to take. You soon find that they too have lived with the denial, resentment, fear, anger, confusion, manipulation, chaos and deceit, all these behaviours played out daily within their lives with an alcoholic. It’s the realisation that these behaviours are not just those of the alcoholics that they have become your behaviours too that makes you see that you too are suffering from the effects of the illness of Alcoholism. Your life is out of control and you are fighting a painful battle and you are not winning.