In at the Deep End

And you thought Tough Mudder was tough?

We throw Lee in at the deep end at University of Huddersfield

Hudds_UniversityThis is my first time being in recovery and I’m learning new things about myself every day. I do share in meetings but sometimes I get really self-obsessed and struggle to share. So when Heath approached me and asked if I would come along and help him with a presentation he was doing at University of Huddersfield, my first reaction was I can’t do that. He told me he was a man short and that Michelle had heard me sharing to the workers from DISC and that I could come along and give a similar speech to a few students. I agreed to come along. He then told me we would be setting off in the morning and my head nearly fell off and I thought again, I can’t do that. But that’s the old me – negative thinking and full of self-doubt.

We (Richard, Stan and Heath) set off the next morning. In the car journey I was calm and relaxed but as soon as we arrived at the University the nerves started. When we entered the room where we were doing the presentation and I saw all the students, I just wanted to turn around and run away. I was so nervous.

Heath started the presentation, then Richard followed by Stan. I remember watching them and thinking they looked really professional knowing my turn to get up was fast approaching. My mouth was dry, my hands were sweating – I got the nudge from Heath and all eyes were on me. I remember standing up and my legs feeling like jelly. I gave a brief talk about some of my drug use and a bit about my recovery and what The Basement has done for me. My mind went blank a couple of times – I looked over to my fellow recoverees only to be greeted with big grins and nods to carry on.

It was a really good experience and I’m proud of myself for seeing it through. To get up in front of all those people and give a talk was a really big thing for me – something I thought I would never do.


Article featured in RecoveryTimes issue  8